TRUST ME AGAIN

“I'm not upset that you lied to me, I'm upset that from now on I can't believe you”

How can I trust someone

If ‘someone’ has broken my trust
My heart is empty, its cold as ice
It reaches to break, leaks out of blood
The blood drips and slips away
That trust, that moment
All within those you have broken

I may not trust you again

But that doesn’t mean we can’t be friends
Just friends without that trust
You have to work your trust with me
Make me understand why should I trust you again

You have to repair that broken trust
You have to work hard
That don’t mean be hateful towards me
Just show me that I can trust you once more.

Muhammad Mahtab Bashir

Voice: 0300 52 56 875

mahtabbashir@yahoo.com

Music to your ears? Music for your heart, too.

Songs that make our hearts soar can make them stronger too, US researchers reported.

They found that when people listened to their favorite music, their blood vessels dilated in much the same way as when laughing or taking blood medications.

“We have a pretty impressive effect,” said Dr. Michael Miller, director of preventive cardiology at the University of Maryland Medical Center in Baltimore. “Blood vessel diameter improved,” he said in a telephone interview. “The vessel opened up pretty significantly. You can see the vessels opening up with other activities such as exercise.” A similar effect is seen with drugs such as statins and ACE inhibitors.

When blood vessels open more, blood flows more smoothly and is less likely to form the blood clots that cause heart attacks and strokes. Elastic vessels also resist the hardening activity of atherosclerosis. “We are not saying to stop your statins or not to exercise but to add this to an overall program of heart health,” said Miller, who presented his findings to a meeting of the American Heart Association in New Orleans.

Miller’s team tested 10 healthy, non-smoking men and women, who were told to bring their favorite music. They spent half an hour listening to the recordings and half an hour listening to music they said made them feel anxious while the researchers did ultrasound tests designed to show blood vessel function.

Compared to their normal baseline measurements, blood vessel diameter increased 26 percent on average when the volunteers heard their joyful music. Listening to music they disliked -- in most cases in this group heavy metal -- narrowed blood vessels by six percent, Miller said. Miller said he came up with the idea after discovering the laughter caused blood to literally flow more smoothly. “I asked myself what other things make us feel real good, besides calories from dark chocolate of course. Music came to mind. ... It makes me feel real good,” he said. Most of the volunteers chose country music but Miller said the style is not as important as what pleases each individual.

Muhammad Mahtab Bashir
mahtabbashir@yahoo.com
Cell: 0300 52 56 875
Islamabad

GOSSIP AT WORK UPS PRODUCTIVITY

Workers who gossip between tasks, not during them, are more productive than those workers who remain isolated, says a new US research.

Office grapevine makes employees productive. (Getty Images)What’s more, communication at the wrong time reduces productivity.

Employees who remain closely knit with one another frequently are more productive than those who are more isolated, the researchers have found.

The researchers used electronic monitoring to tease apart the various types of interaction in the workplace and their differing effects.

Such monitoring could improve how individuals and organizations work, but it raises issues about the extent to which companies monitor their employees' behaviour.

Many studies of communication within organizations, such as of who e-mails whom, have suggested that loose networks, in which people have few contacts in common, boost productivity. But these don't capture face-to-face, moment-to-moment communication, says Benjamin Waber of the MIT Media Lab in Cambridge, Massachusetts.

"People have formal structures and reporting relationships, but when you look at who's actually talking to each other you get a different picture. We can predict productivity far more accurately from these informal structures and behaviours,” Nature quoted Waber, as saying.

Waber and his colleagues equipped a team of 23 employees at a Chicago IT company with badges that detect when they are talking, who they are close to and when they are moving about.

The workers were designing server systems. Over the course of a month, the researchers collected data on 911 individual jobs done by 23 employees in 1,900 hours. As well as measuring the time spent on each job — anything from five minutes to several days — they were able to control for its complexity and detect errors.

People who spent lots of time between jobs interacting with their colleagues — going to lunch or stopping for a chat — ultimately got much more done, the results showed. The best connected employee was 60 percent more productive than the least, says Waber, who presented his results at the International Conference on Network Science in Norwich, UK, on 27 June.

No one suspected that such interaction would help, says Waber.

"The company was astounded — formally, these people were not supposed to be talking to each other," he says.

On the other hand, if someone communicated while they were assigned to a task — whether seeking help or distracted by others — their productivity dropped sharply.

Muhammad Mahtab Bashir
Islamabad
mahtabbashir@gmail.com
Voice: 0300 52 56 875

WORLD'S MOST ROMANTIC COUPLE

The world's most romantic couple Anette and Kenneth Lund have already married each other six times as well as breaking a world record with four ceremonies in one day.

The pair are so besotted they plan to keep tying the knot every year until they die in a bid to keep the excitement of their marriage alive.

Mrs Lund, 32, explained: "When Kenneth asked me to marry him again and again, I loved the idea.

"I'll never get tired of marrying him, even when we're old and grey. I'll have a new dress, flowers and pictures every year. What bride wouldn't love that?"

The couple, from Vejle, Denmark, run a wedding planning website together and jetted off to Las Vegas for their four weddings last month.

They said their vows first at the Venetian Hotel, then in a limousine conducted by Elvis, thirdly in a helicopter above the bright lights of the strip, and finally while skydiving.

"We wanted it to be fun, and it was," said Mrs Lund. "But each time we got married, it was as special as our real wedding three years ago.

"In the morning we had to rush to the registrar to pick up our marriage licences, then we went to a shop to hire a wedding dress and suit.

"It was very hot and we were rushing around all day. But I didn't worry about my hair, or how my make-up looked.

"The only thing that mattered was the man I was marrying and how in love we are."

Ironically, Mr Lund met his wife when he planned her first wedding to her ex-husband, and they started dating when her marriage ended after a year.

Mrs Lund said: "We share the same sense of humour and there's a definite chemistry between us.

"Now we work together, live together and we're very in love.

"We always do romantic things like surprise each other with little notes on the mirror, or flowers in the bed."

Before flying to Las Vegas, Mr Lund handed his wife a box containing a sparkling pink sapphire ring to replace her real enagement ring, which she lost last year.

"I never realised there were so many ways to get married in Las Vegas," he said. "We couldn't decide which to do so we decided to do them all.

"Now we have the world record for the most weddings in a day."

The couple originally wed at a civil ceremony in Denmark in August 2005.

"We sneaked off and got married without telling anyone," said Mrs Lund. "It was romantic because it was just two people in love.

"We invited our families to dinner afterwards and luckily they all forgave us."

But a year later, Mr Lund proposed again and the couple had a full church service in August 2007.

"We had a great day with all our friends and family and Kenneth's daughter Mille, seven, was a bridesmaid," said his wife.

Now the couple are busy planning their next wedding.

"Next year we'd like to say our vows while swimming with dolphins in Mexico," said Mr Lund.
"We're also investigating whether its possible to marry on the Orient Express."

The couple's website helps brides and grooms to be plan everything from their outfits to venues, flowers and table settings.

"We hope to help people have a service as special as all ours have been," said Mrs Lund.

Muhammad Mahtab Bashir

Islamabad

mahtabbashir@yahoo.com

Women unnerved by ‘ogling’ security guards in capital

Islamabad continues to be plagued by a string of issues yet there are some that rarely get highlighted like the security guards - their habit of staring at women, so to speak.

With the security situation showing little signs of improving, more and more guards are now being employed, many of whom are posted outside private homes and it is here where the problem begins.

In some of the posh sectors like those falling under the E and F series, there is barely a house without a guard sitting outside. Clad usually in dark blue uniforms, for most of these men staring at women is a favorite pastime.

Having to perform long duties, at times up to 12 hours each day, there is little else for them to but to watch and stare at everyone going past, especially the women.

The situation is worse in streets where offices, embassies, showrooms and guesthouses have been set up that makes the movement of women quite troublesome. “No one likes being stared at, it is simply a disgusting thing,” remarked Shazia Ahmed, a housewife.

The movement of housewives has been restricted because of this problem. All sorts of people visit the offices in residential areas and there is so much of activity going on outside that it makes it hard for most women to come out of their homes as the presence of security guards was also a big irritant.

Today there are as many as 500 registered security firms that recruit the guards who are then posted in places where the client’s want them to be. More than 100 people come to use for recruitment daily.

However the growing numbers are clearly not going down well with women. Security is everyone’s concern but the unprofessional manner in which the guards perform their duties and their gestures make women feel uncomfortable. The guards are actually a security threat for they shared information with their colleagues and servants in the neighbourhood. They tell others what time a woman next door leaves for work and returns. Tthe guards have given different names to women in different street. This is simply insulting.

On the other hand the security guards have their own story to tell. Some of the guards instead of admitting their wrong said that why were they being singled out. “Everyone looks at women, you cannot put a person in jail for doing so,” said one guard posted in F 6/4 while another thought that it was their duty to keep an eye on everyone. As far as the guards are concerned, they are doing a good job. Really?

Muhammad Mahtab Bashir
House # 2026, Street # 32,
I-10/2, ISLAMABAD.
mahtabbashir@gmail.com
Voice: 0300 52 56 875

FAT women 'more sexually active'

Those who think women scoring more on the weighing scale do not score much when it comes to sexual behaviour, certainly need a reality check, for a new study has revealed that fat ladies have more sex than females with "normal weight".

Oregon and Hawaiian researchers have found that a woman's weight does not seem to affect sexual behaviour.

Led by Dr Bliss Kaneshiro, an assistant professor at the School of Medicine at the University of Hawaii, and Oregon State University professor Marie Harvey, the study was based on data from the 2002 National Survey of Family Growth that looked at sexual behaviour of more than 7,000 women. In earlier studies it was Kaneshiro observed that obese and overweight women have a higher risk of unintended pregnancy than do normal weight women.

Thus, Kaneshiro studied the relationship between body mass index and sexual behaviour, including sexual orientation, age at first intercourse, number of partners, and frequency of intercourse.

"Our analysis demonstrated that obese and overweight women do not differ significantly in some of the objective measures of sexual behaviour compared to women of normal weight. This study indicates that all women deserve diligence in counselling on unintended pregnancy and STD prevention, regardless of body mass index," said Kaneshiro.

The study ruled out the widely held stereotypes that overweight and obese women are not as sexually active as other women, as the researchers concluded that it's the opposite that is true.

"I was glad to see that the stereotype that you have to be slender to have sex is just that, a stereotype," said Harvey.

The data revealed that overweight women were more likely to report having sexual intercourse with a man, even when she controlled for age, race and type of residence.

In fact, 92% of overweight women reported having a history of sexual intercourse with a man, as compared to 87% of women with a normal body mass index.

"These results were unexpected and we don't really know why this is the case," said Kaneshiro.

Kaneshiro's study was awarded first prize at the American College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists' annual meeting this year. The study was published in the September issue of Obstetrics & Gynaecology.

Courtesy: Agencies 

WHY BOYS ALWAYS FALL FOR 'A LADY IN RED'?

DRESSED TO IMPRESS: Why the boys always fall for 'a lady in red'?

Forget that little black dress. Gentlemen really prefer a lady in red. As actress Kelly Brook knows only too well.

Blushing in shades of crimson, scarlet or deep rose, a girl is regarded as prettier and more desirable, research shows.

She is also more likely to be asked out on a date - and have more money lavished on her during the outing.

What is more, men seem completely oblivious to the effect that a glimpse of red can have on their emotions.

The researchers said it appeared they were driven by primal instincts that associate the colour with sex.

The study, carried out at the University of Rochester in the U.S., involved a series of experiments in which men were shown a photo of a 'moderately attractive' young woman.

In some cases, the colour of the border framing the picture was changed, in other cases the colour of the woman's blouse varied. Red, blue, green, grey and white were tested. In all cases, red was judged the most attractive.

The men were much more likely to ask out a woman wearing red. And they estimated they would spend almost twice as much on her as one in blue.

Despite the clear effect, the men insisted colour played little role in their choices, suggesting they were oblivious to the power of red.

The study, published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, claims to provide the first hard evidence of 'society's enduring love affair with red'.

From the red body paints used in ancient fertility rituals, to the phrase 'red light district' and the red hearts of Valentine's Day, the colour has long been associated with romance.

In the animal world, red often signals a female is at her most fertile, with female baboons and chimps blushing conspicuously at this time.

Men are not alone in being attracted to red. The research suggests a man in scarlet is just as irresistible to women.

Allow me to hum one of my favourite romantic golden song of olden days by Chris DeBurgh …

I’ve never seen you looking so lovely as you did tonight
I’ve never seen you shine so bright
I’ve never seen so many men ask you, if you wanted to dance
They’re looking for a little romance
Given half a chance
And I’ve never seen that dress you’re wearing
Or that highlights in your hair
That catch your eyes
I have been blind
The lady in red is dancing with me
Cheek to cheek
There’s nobody here
It’s just you and me
It’s where I wanna be
But I hardly know this beauty by my side
I’ll never forget the way you look tonight
I’ve never seen you looking so gorgeous as you did tonight
I’ve never seen you shine so bright, you were amazing
I’ve never seen so many people want to be there by your side
And when you turned to me and smiled, it took my breath away
And I have never had such a feeling such a feeling
Of complete and utter love, as I do tonight
I never will forget the way you look tonight
The lady in red
My lady in red……

Muhammad Mahtab Bashir
Islamabad

mahtabbashir@yahoo.com

Voice: 0300 52 56 875